If you could take one word out of your vocabulary what would it be? Have you ever wondered what would happen if we took away fear?
I watched a lecture recently by Caroline Myss who is a medical intuitive, spiritual advisor, and inspirational speaker. She is very no nonsense and my first thought was that she’s quite abrupt and I wasn’t sure if I should continue watching her. I was tempted to turn her off, but something in me told me to get over her speaking style and listen to the message. So that is what I did, and she said something that I found really interesting. She asked us to take one word out of our vocabulary. She asked; “If you could choose one word what would it be?” She went on to give an example of what she meant.
She said, “Take out the word hope. Imagine that you have an illness and no hope.” Let’s stop and think about that for a moment. How does that feel? She continued, “Now add hope.” ” How does that change your outlook?” ” How do you feel to now have hope?” “Who comes with it?” ” Who gives you hope?”
I considered how I would have felt during the past two years with chronic pain due to a bulging disc, and then lingering back problems after surgery and I felt so defeated. If I had no hope during all of this I can’t imagine where I would be today. It definitely did not feel very good to even consider this.
I thought about this a little more and wondered, what if I took out the word love. I would lose not just the word and everything associated with it, but all the people that represent love in my life. That doesn’t feel very good either does it?
I wasn’t done thinking about this theory and I went a little deeper with it. What if I was to take away fear? I mean doesn’t that make sense? Wouldn’t life be so much easier without fear? If I lose fear and everything in my life that causes it, people too, wouldn’t that be a good thing?
I suddenly came to this realization, without fear how do I know love? Without fear can there be any real growth? If I fear being like someone that is judgemental, has no compassion, and is led by fear in every area of their lives, then I choose love. I’ve learned to behave better and to invite more love into my life and I think this is a good thing.
Sometimes fear stops me from doing what I want to do, what I wish I could do, and this is when I wish I could let it go. If I take out the word fear and everything that goes with it, then that must include love. I believe fear brings awareness and growth in it’s own peculiar way. I am not saying we should be okay with living in fear, but I believe fear is dangerous when it’s hidden and unacknowledged. What happens though, when we bring our fears to the light? What happens if we acknowledge and even embrace them? They start to lose their power. This is when we can conquer them and take back our power to choose. Choice is a word I certainly would not want to live without. Without fear I lose choice and without choice I lose fear, hope, and love.
Fear is a funny thing. We don’t want it, but without it we wouldn’t learn much and we couldn’t grow and evolve.
I have been in that dark place, in that pit of despair, in tremendous pain, and I felt completely hopeless. I felt as though I would never get better, I would never heal from the pain I was in, and there were people around me that shared that concern. After spending months in incredible pain due to a bulging disc, and then having surgery to repair it, I was still struggling daily with pain. I still have pain sometimes, but the healing process is under way and I am feeling much better than I was.
However, during my most pain filled moments, struggling to keep some semblance of hope and positivity I was told I would never be able to do what I used to do and that I might as well get used to it. I was told that I would likely be looking at multiple surgeries over the rest of my life. I refused to believe this. I will not take on other people’s beliefs because they believe that to be true for them. Just because it is true for them doesn’t mean it has to be true for me. Right?
That is what no hope looks like. That is what living in fear looks like. That is what no choice looks like. When I add hope, choice and love to the equation, then I begin to take my power back. This is what I have chosen.
How do I stay positive? How do I stay hope filled? I do so by saying my affirmations to get me in a loving and hope-filled mindset. I meditate to keep myself in a loving and hope-filled mindset. I journal and write to get out my feelings, to purge and move my energy. I exercise. I talk with friends and people who can truly support. me. People who encourage me to look at the positives and find my strength in the moment. I stay away, very far away from people that want to pull me down and into their own misery. I do the work!
Some days it is hard and the other side, the side of fear feels very comfortable and I might visit for a little while, but then I remember I have a choice and I am the only one that can make that choice. I am the only one that can pull myself up and change my perspective.
Life feels very scary when we live in fear. Life feels very hopeless and lacking in every way.
Life feels very light and hopeful when we live in love. When we make that our focus. Our choice.
Although I would love to be able to say that I would take fear out of my vocabulary and never look back, that just can’t happen. Fear is a part of life and it is here to stay in one way or another. However, so is love, choice and hope, and with those I know I will find balance in my life. I know I am strong enough to handle the things in my life that will show up and cause me fear, but by choosing love and hope I will find a way out of it.
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